Sunday, September 2, 2012
Is every spinster in her thirties under a curse?
If you are a lady, thirty years and over and yet to tie the nuptial knot and living in Nigeria, then somebody might have suggested that you are under a curse and probably need to go for deliverance at the Mountain of Fire and Miracles church. I have found this suggestion quite confusing and so began to ask the question – ‘Is every spinster in her thirties under a curse? After some soul searching, it turns out that my answer is: YES!
Not exactly the answer the ladies were expecting but you are under the curse of a POOR ECONOMY that has caused several women to become bread winners, and men afraid of commitments.
The same curse placed on thousands of Bankers (formerly the most eligible bachelors) who have been today rendered jobless.
The same curse placed on today’s Men in their thirties that they cannot dream of building their own houses when most of our parents at thirty owned at least one house.
The same curse that has driven several young Nigerians abroad in search of greener pastures when the majority of our parents grew up, schooled in Nigeria and could afford a decent life here.
The same curse that sees most people scrambling to own a foreign passport.
The same curse which has led most couples to settle for not more than two kids because of the fear of not being to cater for them when most of our parents had four kids on the average.
YES, we SINGLES (whether – male or female) are all under that curse called poverty.
What however baffles me though is that everyone puts pressure on the Spinster. Why not the Bachelor in his thirties? Who says he doesn’t also need to be delivered of an ancestral curse?
While evil lives among us, the reality is that our economy has deteriorated very badly and so our men are becoming more individualistic. A lot of bachelors are saying “I can’t foot my bills let alone bear the burden of a spouse”. Women are more educated and are saying, “rather than starve while waiting for Mr. Right to show up, I’ll work hard to build a career.” And as Dr. Myles Monroe said in one of his teachings, all the energy the women are supposed to use to support their spouses as ‘Help meets’ they are putting into their career. So is that such a bad thing that she is now called, CURSED?
Truth is times have changed. Once upon a time Nigerian women got married at 18 years, after sometime they began to get married in their twenties, today some women are getting married in their thirties. Some say 30 is the new 20.
Whatever, the case, another reality is that not all will get married, not all who get married will have children so just take each day as it comes and live life.
And according to a quote my friend Dante has on his desk:
“If you are waiting for the love of your life, STOP; they will be waiting when you starting doing what you love”.